January has come and gone!

We started out our new year, anxious for new beginnings and fun!  The first couple weeks, were just that, then once again, our little world came crashing down.  The 1st of the month brought big new changes for us,  preschool starting, which he still loves, thankfully, and we were in the clear to start trying for another baby, which we all desperately want. My body has been completely out of whack since we lost Bella, so I finally gave in and called my OB's office to see if they thought I should come in for blood work or something. So, I called and explained what was going on and the nurse, told me the first thing to do is rule out a pregnancy. So, I do as I am told, go upstairs and take the one remaining test I had, wait for those 3 minutes, and low and behold it comes out positive.  Crazy!!! We couldn't believe it, I thought it was a false positive because there was absolutely no way a HOME pregnancy test would show results after just trying 5 days earlier, right??? This was a Monday, I happened to have a doctor appointment that same afternoon, for something totally unrelated, and when I got to it, told this doctor what was going on and he wanted me to take a blood test for more accurate results.  So I do, get sent home, they call back and yep, it is positive.  So, I call my OB back and they tell me to come in in the morning to get my levels checked to see how far along I was.  Tuesday morning, bright and early, I go to Denver for lab work.  I got home about 10 and I just didn't feel right. So, Clint and I agree that I should go into urgent care here in Longmont. After 3 hours, of blood work, and U/S they too can only tell me that I am pregnant, about 6 to 7 weeks along, but have no idea why I am having these other symptoms.  Awesome. So, home I go.  I was home for about 2 hours and start having severe pain in my lower left side, pain so bad that I was on the floor crying.  Back in we go. Again, lab work and multiple U/S and no answer for the pain. So I am sent home with pain killers and a follow-up with my OB on Friday.  Wednesday and Thursday were spent literally just going from the couch to bed all day. Friday comes and we all pack up and head down to Denver to see my OB.  He comes in, gives me the U/S and he finally tells me the news I have been EXPECTING but DREADING all week. Yes, I was pregnant, but I am miscarrying. So, like I said, it was what I knew was happening all week, but not wanting to really believe.  It was awful.  We get back in the car and head home.  I made a comment to Clint, that at least now, both Brianna and Kyle have their own babies to take care of.  And he said to me, the only possible thing that could make this situation a little better, that maybe these 2 babies were a gift to our siblings, something we were SUPPOSED to give them.  Isn't that an amazing way to look at it??? It made me love him so much more when he said that to me. So, now we have our little Bella Faith and our little boy, Beckett Kyle, waiting for us up in Heaven!

But, we thank God every day, that he let us have our two other amazing kiddos HERE with us!!!

Brennar and Brilee just adore their daddy:)

Liz and the kids came over the Saturday night after all of this happened.  It was so great to have our niece and nephew and our kiddos with us that night.

We love these four oh so much!!!